With a little bit more of innocence.

January 30, 2010 @ 9:55 PM

I Still Believe It's YOU and ME. :)

Now: 10:00 PM

Now Playing: I Still Believe

It's as logical as lights flickering either there is a paranormal activity or it's just my heart finding its way through the uncleared haze. Yess. I was unsure. For so many times, I doubted. It's just the same as when people don't believe God exists but actually, He really does. He just surprises us in every mysterious way he could. Just replace all God's with Love.

I just called her a few minutes ago. It was less than 15 minutes I guess but more than 13 minutes. I had fun and it was a bit of a natural conversation. I liked it.

Everything is okay now. I'm always with you. And I still believe.

To a brighter day in the sun, somewhere I know that she waits for me. Someday soon she'll see I'm the one. I won't give up on this feeling and nothing could keep me away 'cause I still believe in destiny that you and I were meant to be. I still wish on the stars as they fall from above 'cause I still believe, believe in love. I know what's real cannot be denied although it may hide for a while. With just one touch love can calm your fears, turning all your tears into smiles. It's such a wondrous feeling. I know that my heart can't be wrong 'cause I still believe in destiny that you and I were meant to be. I still wish on the stars as they fall from above 'cause I still believe, believe in love. Enough to make miracles change everything, lift you from the darkness and make your heart sing. Love is forever when you fall, it's the greatest power of all. Oh I still believe in destiny that you and I were meant to be. I still wish on the stars as they fall from above 'cause I still believe, believe in love. Yes, I still believe, believe in love. I still believe in love! I still believe, believe in love.

January 24, 2010 @ 10:04 PM

Homeward bound. three clicks of my heels and some bad airplane food.

"There are birds inside the airport. I dunno I just like it when birds are inside. I dunno if they like it. I like how much it bothers ppl."
-Pete Wentz

Siguro hindi na ako magugulat kung bukas ay bukambibig ng lahat ang camp nitong nakaraang dalawang araw sa aming pinakamamahal na paaralan. Maglalabasan ang mga album na may mga litrato ng mga estudyante habang nag-eenjoy sa mga hamon ng kampo at ng mga tao sa likod nito. At sa paglakad ko sa aming paaralan bukas ng umaga, na sana'y hindi ako mahuli, ay maririnig ko ang mga kwentuhan ng mga chismoso't chismosa tungkol sa mga nangyari, keso mahirap daw at nakakapagod pero nag-enjoy naman sila.

Hindi ako magiging negatibo tungkol sa camp, kahit na ganoon nga talaga ang nararamdaman ko tungkol dito. Hindi ko pa rin pagsisisihan na hindi ako sumali dito. Marami akong natutunan habang nasa sibilisasyon nitong Sabado at Linggo. Lumabas kami ng kapatid ko at nag-ikot-ikot. Nilibot namin ang mga tindahan sa syudad at pati na ang pasarang LCC sa di kalayuan nito. Kumain kami at sa paglakad-lakad ay marami akong natutunang bagay na marahil ay hindi natutunan ng kasama ko. Natuto akong magtipid—isang bagay na marahil ay hindi natutunan ni ate dahil siya lang naman ang gumagastos sa amin noon at isang bagay na hindi magagawa ng mga campers kung pera ang pag-uusapan dahil walang tindahan sa loob ng camp, o kung meron man, ay hindi ko alam dahil hindi ko binalak na pumunta doon. Marami rin akong napagtanto na marahil ay naisip ko na noon pero parang may pumipigil sa akin na isipin ito.

Mga Bagay sa Utak Ko sa Aking Paglalakad

Maraming masasamang salita sa linggwaheng Ingles. Yung tipong ang -ing sa hulihan ng salita ay nagiging -in'.
Siguro mahoholdap kami. Grabe. Nafefeel ko talaga.
Ibang klaseng sales lady sa LCC na yun. Ang bilis magsalita pagkatapos kunin ang resibo namin at ipagpalit ito sa isang lampshade, isang kutsilyo, isang tadtaran, isang sangkalan, at isang sandok, binalot, saka kami hiningan ng P199.90. Nagrequest pa, sa kanya na daw yung 10C.
Hindi porke't walang girlfriend, kailangan nang umastang brokenhearted.
Hindi porke't nililink, e may relasyon na ang dalawa.
Ako ba talaga ang nakaiwan ng plantsa sa kwarto..habang nakasaksak?
May mahahanap kaya akong suit para sa prom? Maganda yung suit nung manikin sa LCC. Pero I doubt na kasya yun sa akin.
Ano ba ang mangyayari sa akin sa Research? Wala pa kaming Research paper at ano ang score ko sa Exam?
Paano kaya ako makakabili ng bagong adaptor para sa aking earphones? Sana may magregalo. BTW, ang adaptor ay yung wire na nilalagay sa earphones. Malaki kasi ang pin ng earphones ko, yung tipong pang-speaker. Malay mo mabasa to ni ate. Haha. Bilhan niya ako. :))
Siguro panahon na para ibalik ko ang lahat sa dati. Nahihirapan na ako. Pero siguro mas nahihirapan siya sa kalabuan ko. Kaya yan. Mabuti pa ang dati.

Patay na ba talaga si Johnny Depp? Ngayong araw na to, maraming balita ang lumabas na patay na raw si Johnny Depp dahil sa isang car crash sa puno. Marami daw kasi itong nainom (Si Johnny Depp, hindi yung puno). Pero hindi pa naman verified kung totoo ang balitang to. E kung sakaling hindi naman, makonsensya kung sino ang sumulat ng chismis na to. Hindi man lamang inisip kung ano ang mararamdaman ng pamilya ni Johnny. (Feeling close na, speaking "depp" pa. Yeaah. Dai mo na naman gets yang paggamit ko ning quotation marks.)

Marami akong nakukuhang ideya kay Pete Wentz. Hindi ko inisip na ganun siya nakakatawa.

"I would live in a cave if I could. Not like the bat cave more like a fred flinstone one."
-Pete Wentz

January 21, 2010 @ 8:12 PM

I have always wished for your happiness. And now you are happy. My wish came true.

I look forward to things. Being indecisive and having no plans at all in my life, I can barely hold on. I am tired and had 5 hours of sleep each day this week. I can hardly breathe. My head is cluttered with thoughts I should not think. My words are full of ideas I never imagined to have said. And now I am a big ball of depression. I want to kick anything I see, punch anyone walking by and shout out loud at the mountain top. I never got myself depressed this bad since third year. Now I want to graduate. There is just nothing to be worth cherishing for aside from iCarly videos I am fond of watching.

Below is my ultimate reason why I never liked commitments. It's not like I do not want to be in a relationship. It's just that I have these things to consider and I just haven't found that someone who thinks she deserves me and I deserve her. Right now, no girl exists.

Number One Reason I Never Liked Commitments

Being in an exclusive relationship is like entering Hotel California—when you get in, there's no way out. Or even if you get out, you need to obliterate everything, leaving only shards of heartaches and goodbyes.

Ayaw kong magsalita ng tapos. Marahil ay marami akong naiisip ngayon. Marami akong nararamdaman. Marami akong tanong. Marami akong gustong gawin. ~~At higit sa lahat, marami akong pagsisisi. Kung maibabalik ko lang ang dati, ibabalik ko iyon. Ngunit sabi nga ng isang kaibigan, walang bagay ang naibabalik.~~ Bahala na. Wala namang mawawala. Dahil wala naman talaga. Sila lang ang nagsasabing mayroon.

January 14, 2010 @ 4:44 AM

It got me coming undone.

Something happened. And that is why I was acting that strange yesterday. Shouting inside the room, criticizing almost everyone even cats and chickens along the road, or even posing a mean look on people I don't even know -those are the things I did and perhaps would continue doing as long as this something is not blown to smithereens.

I know that something would change, and I know for a fact that even I changed a lot. Yet history really repeats itself, and stupidity is a disease prone to everyone. I don't know what this person is thinking, or if this person is even thinking. Well, I hope that once that person realizes what that person did, that person would not regret the single action that person has done. I know that I do not live in someone else's shadow. I do not make an identity for others to be pleased. And that is one thing I am proud of. I was thinking of giving people a dose of their own medicine, or gladly I would say, revenge. But no. I'll just turn the other cheek and start all over again.

I have plans and everything is structured out. Letters, messages, settings -they are all part of my plan. But a single thing removed the platform below and crumbled it to ashes and dust. I guess there is nothing left but those -ashes and dust. I am not being emo here. The thing is, I was depressed and the least thing I can do is cry and shout.

IV-Ravenclaw - 5:35pm - January 13, 2010

Don't think that something like this happened, or whatever people might think after reading this. Don't conclude for something that happened. One day, perhaps a month later, I can get over from that something. It's a big thing. Yes. A big thing.

Maybe it’s true that I can’t live without you. Maybe two is better than one. There’s so much time to figure out the rest of my life. And you thought that it got me coming undone and I’m thinking I can’t live without you, ‘cause, baby, two is better than one.